Submission

Touchy topic in a way…

To submit to the universe. Not surrender… Not give up… But to submit and acknowledge there are things out there we cannot change.

To submit to desires though… That twists the definition a bit. Not in that raw fact of it but in reality it is different. To submit to desires is to allow yourself to experience what you want and deny culpability in those desires. “It’s just he way it is and I had no control “. Outside of someone forcing something upon another person… That is not submitting… That is rape (of mind, body, spirit or possessions)… I don’t think I believe in that kind of submission

I submit to the universe… There are certainly things I cannot change and to try would be all kinds of futile.

I will not submit to my desires. Sexual, edible, behavior…. These things I can feel I cannot simply say, “I submit” to.

Last night I was awake most of the night. My brain was troubled and I don’t sleep well when that occurs. Around 2AM I got out of bed and ate a donut that my house-mate had brought home. It was compulsive. I knew it. I acknowledged this. And accepted the action. I would say I did surrender to the compulsion, willingly. And later on, when I felt poorly due to this I knew why and acknowledged that.

So I feel I can say I surrender. And at times I will surrender. To my desires of the moment… No matter what they may be. But in that I will still acknowledge my own culpability. I am responsible for my actions and reactions.

I will not submit though… To anyone but the universe.